On soul mates and their variations...

Soul mates. Let’s face it, we all have wondered where is that special someone who’s supposed to complement us perfectly. Soul mates are everywhere you look. Literature, history, fairy tales and gossip magazines… After all, most celebrities seem to find at least two of them each year. But who are the normal people that actually found their soul mates?
I met up with my friends Tom, Alice and Elektra for one of our power lunches. Tom was currently dating no one in particular and everyone in general. When I asked him about soul mates he said:
- Of course I believe in soul mates. I mean, there must be someone out there who’s just, you know… Perfect. I’m just looking for mine and then everything will fit nicely.
To my shock, Elektra kept sipping her cocktail without a word. Alice seemed to have noticed that odd behavior too. After all, she was the cynical among us. We both stared at her:
- What? – She finally demanded. – I happen to believe there are soul mates out there.
- Seriously? – I asked her, while Alice chocked on her orange juice.
- Seriously. My best friend Gina for one seems to be able to read my mind. We know all about each other and can feel each other’s moods. I mean it.
- I mean a soul mate. – Tom repeated as though he thought she had two too many cocktails. - A man who matches you.
- Oh, a man who will understand me perfectly? – She sneered and seemed to fall back into her normal self. - Honey, I thought we had agreed that’s impossible. Men and women are genetically programmed not to understand each other. Unless one is gay.
Alice drew herself straight, her silky hair shining under the beautiful sun.
- But that’s crazy! Soul mates are supposed to be that special person who gets you completely!
- Like your boyfriend does? – Blurted Elektra.
Alice blushed and said:
- Well…
- She’s right Ellie. Soul mates are like our opposite sex selves. – Tom tried to keep going.
- Why though? Really, why? So we can marry them? So we can turn finding the soul mate a Holy Grail journey? Why can’t my soul mate be my best friend? Someone I know and care and who knows me really well and will be there for me no matter what?
Both Tom and Alice tried to answer back, but seemed without arguments. I thought Elektra’s theory quite amazing though. It made everything less complicated and made much more sense than this whole THE ONE bullshit.
In the Iphone society when any object has at least 5 different functions, are we expecting too much from one person? I was still wondering about the subject when a married friend invited me for a coffee at her house. Maren had been married for almost 9 years and had three children with her banker husband and lived in a nice townhouse in the south part of the city. When I asked her if she believed in soul mates she promptly answered yes and explained:
- When he shows up you know it. I mean, when I first met Nick I felt different. And I swear that by the end of our second date, I was lost.
- Wow. You’re really lucky.
She smiled as if to say YES and I kept going:
- So, you can have everything in one person?
- What do you mean? -She asked while she helped her youngest daughter on her lap. The baby looked at me curiously.
- I mean, can you have everything in one person? The best friend, the husband, the great sex… Everything?
Maren stared at me for a moment and said:
- I don’t know about that. You see, my husband is wonderful and I can’t imagine living without him, but I need my “me” time… And there are things he just wouldn’t understand. I need my girlfriends for that. So, that’s why I have a night a week just to hang out and do girl stuff.
That night Elektra, Tom and I were invited to Alice's apartment for a little private party. Tom had picked a great wine, Elektra made us a lovely homemade dinner and Alice told us the best stories about her weird family. We all had a wonderful time.
I left them thinking that maybe there isn’t an exact answer. Maybe soul mates, like Mcdonald’s menus can come in combos with or without sex, with some extra friendship, without girl talk or extra spicy. Maybe all you have to do is find your personal recipe and enjoy … With a nice cocktail.